


The Amazing life of a Deputy

by Themostannoyingthingever



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: F/F, F/M, Idk what’s to say ahhh, just a lil, uhhhh Maybe a lik gay??
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-11
Updated: 2018-09-16
Packaged: 2019-07-10 22:08:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15958535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Themostannoyingthingever/pseuds/Themostannoyingthingever
Summary: In which the Deputy gets a phone, and the seeds phone number. So what the hell might as well talk to them  they did put her in a group chat.OrJohn sends to many selfies. Faith doesn’t know what nudes are. Joseph is a housewife and Jacob keeps sending wolf pictures. And the deputy is loosing her mind over trying to figure out who the hell steve is.





	1. Don’t text me

**Author's Note:**

> Don’t forget I read all your messages. So if something needs to be fixed or you want to see something added in, just comment down beeelooooww, okie anyways enjoy

In Rooks defense, getting a mysterious box delivered to her porch in the middle of night while she’s currently fighting a holy war against psychotic sons a bitchs would unease anybody.

Maybe not as much as Rook.

It was 1:14 AM. Her hair was everywhere. Flying left and right.Rooks usual fighting clothes switched out for a very casual tank top, no bra, sweatpants look. It was comfortable and made her boobs look great so yeah she wore it.

It made her feel normal to wear this shit.

Previously she was wrapped up in her bed, looking and sleeping and fucking feeling like a baby. Hair going wherever it pleased, legs at a 90 degree angle with one arm under her pillow. Not a goddamn care in the goddamn world when her door bell rang.

Immediately her instincts kicked in and from her fetal position, she shot up holding her gun she kept under her pillow and aiming at no where.maybe at the wall, probably at the floor, it was too dark to know. Tired, pissed off, and....well tired. She crept her way of the bed, cursing herself when the wood below gave a creek under her sudden weight.  
She was three steps away from her bedroom door and she had already scanned the entire house, mentally planning out an escape route for any possible outcome.

Two steps away from her door and her entire screamed at her to go check from the back, circle around the house and catch anybody who DARE disturb her beauty sleep. Rook barely got it as it is. But her wrath was going. She wanted to catch who ever it was and slam their face on the floor.

She opens the door very slowly. And.... well she practically launched her self backwards when she saw the box. Pure black in a box form. Almost camouflage into the dark surroundings, it startled Rook so her hand flung up. Aiming directly towards it as if it were going to sprout legs and walk the fuck away.

“What the fuck.” Her voice was shaky. In her mind it was a goddamn bomb. And in her sleepy state she completely ignored the letter on top of it.

“Grace get your ass over her,” she said with her radio raised to her mouth, “ there’s a fucking bomb on my porch.” It didn’t take the Deputy’s favorite soldier long to come over and unlike the deputy, she was dressed in her fight clothes.

Rook was there for what seemed forever, eyefucking the box. Still not noticing the card. Dumbass. Browne hair draped over her shoulders, eyes not focusing on anything but the box. Rook isn’t a bomb expert on bombs. She doesn’t know if she can move it or not. So in her half awake mind she said to herself, ‘well Grace has been to war, they have bombs, she’ll know what to dooo’

Grace arrived four minutes after the call, sprinting towards the house before her eyes meet the black box on the porch. Then, her gaze snapped to the deputy standing in her living room pointing the gun at the box as if that’ll do anything. 

Their eyes meet. “ Jesus Fucking Christ Grace! My ass has been sitting out here forever!” Rooks voice didn’t match her profanity, it was shaky and hoarse from being passed out previously.

Graces eyes narrow, “Sorry deputy, I was busy.” With loads of sarcasm to her tone, she eyed the box again. Curiously studying it as any soldier like her would. Even Jacob. Especially Jacob.

“It’s not a bomb,” Rooks eyebrows furrow showing clear confusion, “There’s a note here, wherever sent this wants you to be alive to read it.” Stupid Rook, she could sense the mocking tone Grace gave her.

‘Ah.... That made sense.’ Rooks tired mind thought.

Rook felt really embarrassed not because of her clothes that showed off every curve she had and every scar she gathered, drawing attention to her WRATH tattoo. Nor her just being plain stupid. More because she still had the gun drawn. So she turned the safety off and threw it on the couch.

A sigh coming from the depths of her soul, goddamn was she relieved it wasn’t a bomb, the sigh got a chuckle outta Grace in response. 

“Well... uhh...” Rook was blushing furiously.

“Let’s check it out Dep.” Grace was already holding the box when she ripped the card off the box. Her face twisting in a mix of disgust and confusion and....disgust.  
Rook hushered over when Grace handed it over. “It’s from John, man what the hell did you guys do down at confession that’s got him wrapped around your finger?” The comment wasn’t a question, more of an insult, it got Rooks stomach to drop at the name. Her wrath rising at alarming rates.

“Nothing. Nothing but him accusing me of things and fapping to his own voice.” Rook was beyond pissed. It was one thing to get awakened by Peggies but it was something else to get awakened by the motherfucker himself.

She grabbed the note while Grace working on opening the box. The card had a few words on it, all in cursive and at the bottom signed by John.

“My dear deputy, I hope you enjoy the gift, try not to be greedy with it though, we wouldn’t want to add that in to the already growing list of sins you have.” She said aloud.

“Uhh deputy...” Grace pointed in the box, eyes on Rook. Rook peered in the box and her heart FUCKING JUMPED.

It was a cellphone.

A simple IPhone 6, with a white phone case. What the hell? Why? For what? Could it still be a bomb? So many, too many questions running through Rooks mind when Grace plobbed the box in Rooks hands and made her way to her car. 

“Too early for his shit deputy, see ya in the morning.” Was the last things rook heard before the sound of a very loud engine cut through and the image of Grace climbing into a Peggie truck she obviously stole. Rook couldn’t get a word in because Grace was already down the road, leaving rook alone. With a phone.

——————————-

Rook was showered and clean. Hair tucked neatly in a high ponytail and wearing her usual dirty jean that she should really clean, and her trouble maker shirt. Looking very pleasant but her face was making an exaggerated expression. She was in her kitchen staring at the phone in her hand.

Hesitantly, she opened it. And lo and behold her fucking background was a picture of the seed family. “Ugh” her face betrayed her and displayed a lovely smile, one she would deny if caught with in this certain situation.

The first thing that popped up was the text messages.

“Holy shit. 56 unread messages, who the fuck is texting me?” Oohhh boy, when she opened the app she had to physically and mentally take a few steps back.

It was a group chat.... and the seed family.

Each one labeled with their name and each one having texted her individually. It was Joseph that was the most recent so she investigated that one first, she was also cringing VERY hard.

JOSEPH SEED  
11:35 PM  
“Hello child, it’s me, Joseph. Has John’s men sent the phone yet?” 

What the fuck. How the fuck was she suppose to respond to that? Considering the time he sent it and when she got the phone, the box must’ve been out their for a while, or maybe Joseph was just early on texting her, who knows

DEPUTY ROOK  
1:20 AM  
“Joseph for the last goddamn time I’m not calling you daddy, drop the whole child think okay?”

She sent the message knowing how he’d react, she knew the Seeds enough to know how push their buttons, it was her hobby and she could possibly make a career out of it.

Next was Jacob, he had only two sent messages. Oh how charming, their both threats.

JACOB SEED  
11:45 PM  
“Hey lil pup, ain’t this convenient? I can talk to ya’ even when your not here. Which you should be, right at my side lil pup, right where you belong.”

JACOB SEED  
12:36 AM  
“Listen pup, you better not be ignoring my texts, don’t wanna get nasty with ya’. Reply soon or I’ll be seeing ya soon.”

The last one sent chills to her spine, Jacob unnerved her at first but eventually, like everything the Rooks life, she coated it was a BUNCH of humor. She practically thought of Jacob as a furry crazy old man with a wolf fetish. 

DEPUTY ROOK  
1:22 AM  
“Ayy jakey Jake, what’s up my favorite wolf man? How’s duke doing?”

Duke was the judge next to her cage cell I mean they weren’t friends but he never tried to bite her arm off the the other girl so it was something to rook. She remembers the look on Jacobs face when he caught her talking shit about him to duke, saying the most vulgar things that surprised even him. Yeah... she got a few scars outta that but one hell of a story.

She moved on the John, for one simple reason. He texted her 13 times. Mostly about confessions and then the others about how she was a Ssssinnnerrrr.

If Addie was here, she’d never hear the end of it. Man if Sharky found out, the amount of shit she would get from it.... she was only responding because they might give her some valuable information on Edens gate. And they need that for sure.

Yeah.... that’s why.

DEPUTY ROOK  
1:24 AM  
“Love the phone John, it suits my green eyes, but I swear to god if you spam me like that again I will throw it off that ‘Yes’ sign of yours, got it?”

God she loved poking fun at him...

Faiths was simple.

FAITH SEED  
11:16 PM  
“Deputy! I can’t wait to talk to you, although I can’t right now I have to go to sleep. I still cant wait!!!! Quick check out the group chat. We’re all waiting.”

Wait.... oh shit... Rook completely forgot about the group chat.

“Fuck me..” she quickly exited out of Faith’s messages and opened the group chat. Named Edens Gates of all things. There were so much talking but nothing recent but by far the most alarming thing about this was the people in the chat. Joseph, Jacob,John, Faith and Steve. Who the hell was steve? Why the hell was rook in this chat? Again questions and questions racing through her head. 

She sat in her couch and classically having a beer in her hand, scrolling up to read the chats talk.  
It was about schedules which was valuable info so yay point one for rook, but their was also talking. Faith asking which dress to wear, John and Jacob fighting over some shit and Joseph talking to this Steve dude. From what Rook can gather he must be someone important so Joseph, maybe a personal bodyguard since he occasionally talks to Jacob about training. That makes sense in Rooks mind. Still wondering why she’s even in here considering the fact that she is the enemy of the seeds. So like the badass she is, she musters up any courage she can get at 1:26 AM in the morning and starts typing.

DEPUTY ROOK  
1:30 AM  
“Why the hell am I in the group chat?”

Is what she settles on after three minutes of deciding. Rook was beyond pissed. Sleep was stolen from her and now all she can do in the meantime was wait.

Until someone answered.

Anyone.

Even Steve.

———————————-  
8:04 AM

Rook passed out, beer in hand and drooling...eww  
She awake to the beautiful bark of Boomer. The amazing dog was face to face with her, tail waggling and head turned to the side to obviously signal that he wanted fun. A very load groan turned to laughter came out of Rook when boomer began licking her face. She sat up, elbows on knees and hands ruffled in boomers thick hair.

“Augh boomer, now I gotta change silly boy!”

She walked down the hall of her house with boomer at her tail, clearly confused on why they were walking to her closet instead of the goddamn outside world he wanted to play in. Rook striped off all her clothes. The only boy she would let see her naked was the bestest boy in the world, her dog. Once striped of the horrible confinement’s called clothes, she pulled black sweatpants, a loose crop top displaying the devil and her usual dirty yellow boots to add color.

I mean if it wasn’t for the handgun around her thigh and the huge ass knife strapped around her waist, aaanddd the sniper rifle she hold on to she would look like any normal 27 year old women her age. Except just a bit rock n roll.

She went for her fishing gear when she spotted it, her phone. Right. She had completely forgotten it even existed, she was to preoccupied in going to get breakfast for her and her angel of a dog to even think of it. 

“ ahh shit boomer,” her hand ruffled at his head once again, “ I got Seeds to talk to.” Clear disappointment in both of their whines they let out at the same time but nonetheless Rook dropped her rifle and sat on the couch, phone already opening the text messages. 

“ Jesus fuck, they text like highschool girls, I didn’t even know we had signal down here.”

Who to choose, Joseph’s seemed important but John already sent three new ones....hmm, Jacob it is.

JACOB SEED  
8:00 AM  
“Mmm lil pup, leave the nicknames to me okay? And that wolf you call duke? He died three weeks ago, wasn’t strong enough. Poor thing, you must’ve rubbed off on him. Gave him some of your weakness.”

Guilt foamed at her stomach. She really liked duke, he was the only thing that kept her sane during her stay there. And the venom Jacob carried in that text did nothing but fuel her guilt. But she knew his little game, she knew what he was trying to do and boy if she didn’t shut that shit down, she was as good as dead. So guilt goes down the drain.

DEPUTY ROOK  
8:12 AM  
“Jakey, my nicknames are amazing. But fine if ya insist I’ll resort to the second best. Bye AssHat.”

That’ll get him going for a while. At least she that’s what she thought because he was already texting away in the group chat. Now that was her priority.

She opened the group chat and found that her text was already old news, she fished up and found the answer which was already buried in something the Seeds decided to be talked about 

RIGHT NOW. 

The response she got was from Joseph. It was vexing.

7:45 AM 

“My child, you have as much of a role to play in gods game as the rest of us.”

Short and simple. So Joseph.

At the bottom of the group chat, John and Jacob were writing to Faith about the Angels, concerned about the recently finding a few over at their turf. 

JACOB SEED  
8:12 AM  
“Faith I swear to god if I find another’s angle in MY mountains, I’m bringing MY judgeship over to the Henbane.”

JOHN SEED  
8:12 AM  
“Yes Faith, leave your circus freaks to you’re own land and leave them out of mine. I have enough trouble as it isn’t with a certain debuts running around destroying everything in her path.”

Ugh. The eye roll Rook made made her head hurt a bit, of course he was talking trash about her. Time to step in.

DEPUTY ROOK  
8:13 AM  
“Yea Faith, the bros have ‘serious’ business to attend to. How do you expect big bad Jacob Seed to make angry wolf slideshows if angels are getting high everywhere?”

Deputy was a lot of things,and she was spiteful. Extremely. This was a golden opportunity after a bad experience with the bliss in which their was a bear chewing at Rooks arm and Faith did NOTHING to help. Well middle finger to you Faith.

JOHN SEED  
8:14 AM  
“Deputy! What a pleasent surprise to have you finally reply! I was becoming impatient. Regardles, hearing from you is always welcomed... come to say yes?”

Of fucking course John would abuse this situation. Her nose crinkled and boomer wasn’t becoming impatient, so she threw the phone across the room, it didn’t break. Damn it. 

She picked up her fishing gear and steered her and boomer out the door, leaving her phone behind.

What use would she need it for while she fishing?

I mean

Nothing bad wasn’t gonna happen if she didn’t reply for a few.

 

Jacob wouldn’t really kidnap her over something so stupid.

 

Maybe John.

No

Eh....


	2. Missing a dog.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the deputy....looses her dog....
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Like in the title

Fishing. She couldn’t even do fishing without something happening. She was on her way to catch her fourth Rainbow Trout, legs lazily sprawled in front of her and sun beating down on her. And the beautiful sound of a fish trying it’s hardest to fight against the hook, completely trapped and surely in pain. 

Rook didn’t care. She didn’t consider how the fish must feel, so she was ruthless dragging it closer to her and so in the moment, it took her brain a few seconds to register the sound of splashing.

Then the sound of a plane.

Her eyes dotted upwards and of FUCKING course it was one of the chosen plane. Ruthlessly tailing another plane through the skies. Without a second thought she lunges into the water, cursing herself for forgetting her rifle back home, the hell was she suppose to do, land a headshot with a handgun while the head in question was racing through the skies? Rook was good but not that good.

She pulled herself out and hurried near a couple of bushes, hearing the familiar splashing sounds. Rook angled herself in the bushes, now allowing her to see what was causing the sound. It was one of those special Peggie’s holding down a stranger underwater, and another near by watching. She remembers being that stranger, although it wasn’t just any Peggie drowning her.

“A fucking baptism near my fishing spot. How the hell didn’t I see this before?” Rook murmured all the while preparing to throw a throwing knife into the bystanders head.

Boom. The loud thud he made when he collapsed alerted the other Peggie nearby, he quickly let go of the stranger and stood dumbfounded. “What was that-“ Too late. Rooks knife found a cozy home in his head before he could finish that sentence. His body splashed into the water and the stranger who was now gasping for air was practically pissing herself.

Rook just walked away. Circling back to her fishing spot to wrap it up. Leaning down to pick up her fishing rod and other supplies, She could see the stranger looking everywhere to identify whoever her savior was before her eyes landed on Rooks figure. Blonde hair wet and hugging her round face just like her clothes were hugging her round figure. It reminded Rook of Tammy, whom scared her shitless the first time they met.

“Heya!” Rook waves with her free hand, displaying her friendliness smile. The strangers, startled, quickly turned her body to face Rook.

“Sorry didn’t mean to scare-“

“No! Oh thank god. Thank you! I thought I was gonna die for a moment!” The stranger barely got her words out before the plane which Rook consider long gone shot her down. In that split second moment, rook could see it. 

Her body being pieced. 

Her hand catching a bullet in the palm. 

Going though the skin like knife cutting through butter.

Her body collapsing backwards right next to the Peggie’s in the water.

Rook instincts now screaming at her. Placing one leg infront of the other was easy. Too easy, maybe because bow Rook was used to the death, especially the sudden kind.

She was knee deep in the woods but not lost, it was the valley, the woods would never last that long here and besides this WAS Rooks fishing spot.

“Got that sinner!” Fucking douche. That ‘sinner’ he shot was Tammy 2.0. Nonetheless Rook fought the rising urge to try her luck at that headshot. Instead settling on thinking of the nice beer she’s gonna get over at the Spread Eagle.

To Rooks calculations, she was a few mile away from Falls end. Home sweet home. 

A few more miles.

Rook was now walking to the entrance. 

There! She was back! Now the dilemma of choosing the Spread Eagle or her house....hmm

“Oh shit, my phone.” Rook babbled out and started booking it to her house. A cozy little place colored light blue but rusted so much it debatable what color it really is.

Once inside she remembered another thing.

“OH SHIT BOOMER.”

Now suddenly realizing the absence of her favorite lil pup. Lil pup. Jacobs threats. No. Not now.  
Where did she last see him? When and why did she stop paying attention to him? Where the hell would he go?

Too many questions racing in her head. The best option was to circle back to where she’s been and pray he’s there. But this time, with her fucking rifle.

She picks it up with a death grip and hesitantly picked up her phone. Maybe they knew something?

Rook was desperate. She was sweating and guilt was now her new meal because it was sitting at her stomach eating HER alive. So she’s must do it.

EDEN’S GATE:  
DEPUTY ROOK  
9:35 AM  
“Have you guys seen boomer?”

Short, simple and right too it. She was pacing around her living room trying to think of every place he could’ve gotten lost at. God she hoped it wasn’t near the crime she just witnessed. Then her phone gave a ding, indicating someone sent a text to her. She checked it as fast as she could. 

EDEN’S GATE:  
JACOB SEED  
9:36 AM  
“Mmm, lost that rut already? Good, he was a sorry excuse of a predator.”

Asshole. She was at the edge of a heart attacke and he’s shit talking her dog? She felt like a soccer mom watching her son lose the game. Fucking stupid. She didn’t reply though, instead she decided backtracking was the best idea. So with a steady jog she started going down the road she went previously, remembering boomer being by her side.

Going down the road she remembered having him nearby, but not physically seeing him nearby, just a hunch.

It was somewhere around her fishing spot when she’s couldnt recall having her dog at her side in her memories. This must’ve been where she last saw him. Sweating and sticky she began her search, checking EVERYWHERE. No stone unturned.

Under the dock, near the bushes, maybe around some trees? Her mind was racing with locations he could be at when-

“Hey Deputy, loose a dog?” 

Rooks body flipped around in lightning speed. A response to the low female voice she just heard,and a sense of relief running through her bloodstream. 

It was Grace and boomer. 

Of course it was Grace. Boomer liked Grace as much as he liked Rook. So, of course that would be the cause of him wandering off, he must’ve smelled her distinctive scent of lemon and gunpowder nearby and decided going fishing with Rook wasn’t has much fun as sniping with Grace.

Fair enough.

“Oh my god,” Room laughed, very breathy but still a laugh, “Grace, I was about to have a heart attack.” Grace laughed in response. Boomer between the two of them, not sure which badass mama he wanted to be next to.

“Yeah, I was out shooting some Peggie’s when this guy came racing’s towards me, where the hell were you? I was radioing.” Grace eyes narrow, but smile still there, giving Rook some reassurance. As if to say ‘your not in deep shit yet but you might be soon.’

“I left my radio back home.” Rook replies, keeping the distance between them and hating it because the distance was now becoming akward.

It was true, Rook did leave her radio back home, on the kitchen counter to be exact. But only because she had her phone and she hadn’t thought that, oh yeah her world doesn’t revolve around the Seeds and that’s other people need to talk to her too. Silly her.

Grace hummed. Smile fading, she was becoming suspicious. It wasn’t the first time Rook did this but still...weird. Grace closed the space between them and draped her arm over Rooks shoulder. S slight squeeze on her arm.

“At ease soldier, your only human. Just don’t do it again.” Graces voice lowered and tensed a bit. Making the words sound like threats. Grace knew how to use her soldier voice and it gave Rooks the weepie jeepies.

“Yes sir.” With a nod from Rook,They began walking back to falls end, boomer at their tail and Rooks phone vibrating against her ass but luckily on silent.

Thank god. She couldn’t bare hearing Graces soldier voice scolding her for texting the Seeds. Rook was a bit guilty, neither her or Grace talked the whole way back so it left Rook with her thoughts, should she really be texting the Seeds? No she’s shouldn’t. 

Nothing good was to come outta this. But Rook was stupid, not the sharpest tool in the shed. They were already infront of Spread Eagle and Rook foot became to heavy to move, not from pain, but from laziness. Since the morning, she has been chasing down boomer and it was exhausting.

So when Grace and boomer entered the Spread Eagle, Rook couldn’t help but pulling out her phone. Not caring who could see and the questions they would throw at her.

EDEN’S GATE:  
FAITH SEED  
9:45 AM  
“Deputy, did you loose your dog? Where are you? I could send someone to help you!”

Ha ha ha, mRook knew Faith wasn’t offering help, this was a trick. She may be stupid but she’s wasn’t a fool. This trick was one to make her believe she cared. She wasn’t gonna fall for it.

EDEN’S GATE:  
DEPUTY ROOK  
9:45 AM  
“No thanks angel face, found him. I don’t need your help.”

The less she’s spoke to them, the better.

EDEN’S GATE:  
FAITH SEED  
9:46 AM  
“Okay Deputy, Well i hope he’s okay. Hes a cute puppy.”

EDEN’S GATE:  
DEPUTY ROOK  
9:46  
“Thanks.”

What? Why would she thank Faith? Faith Seed of all people, the bitch that giggled and laughed while Rooks arm was being chewed by a bear. Faith Seed! The girl who drugged her in order for them to have fucking girl time.

God damn it she fell for the trick. 

Rook face palmed herself after realizing all this. Too late, because now that little ‘thanks’ got John talking, and now Jacobs talking and now Joseph and now FUCKING STEVE. What the fuck!

A heavy sigh was her all she could muster, too exhausted from the mornings activities. Swiftly putting the phone in her back pocket to vibrate. Deciding something that’s at the time seemed like a great idea. Rooks gonna get drunk now.

Very wasted.

Unholy some would say.

Hopefully Rook isn’t a drunk texter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof. Sorry if this seems hurried, I’m really tired rn and I just wanna go to sleep sssoooo bad, but don’t worry guys
> 
>  
> 
> There will be nudes soon ;)


	3. Not friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their not friends, but nudes have been sent.

Walking into the bar was like feelings your lungs with cold air, refreshing. The scenery was something Rooks grew fond of. The purple lights and welcoming faces always gave her ease, each smile on each face made Rooks heart warm up. These were the people she’s protecting, all huddled up with a beer in one hand and another in no need of a gun for protection. They were safe there because of her. Refreshing.

The Rock n’ Roll music playing on the jukebox found its way into Rooks bloodstream. Her worries being thrown out the door and now she can just relax.

Closing her eyes for a moment and exhaling, she made her way to counter where Mary May and Grace were having small talk.

 “Hello ladies,” Rook began,sitting on a stool, waving at Mary and winking at Grace, “can I buy ya’ a  _drink?”_ Mary’s chuckles got a glance from Grace, clearly eye rolling at the joke. Rooks loved getting Mary May to laugh. When she’s not being chased by heralds, or killing Peggie’s, she’s throwing her best jokes at Mary May in high hopes to hear the amazing doing of her laugh. Reminded Rook of....beer

damn Rook needs to get drunk.

“Are ya hitting on me again Rooks?” Mary  giggled out, walking towards Rooks and placing her hand over Rooks gloved, scarred and beaten to hell hands.

”much appreciated, but it clear away that massive tab you got.” Now Grace was chuckling at that. 

Rook opened her mouth to whine, But Grace beat her to it.

 “Mary get her beer, she’s gonna need it.” Mary nodded and turned around to go looking for Rooks favorite beer. Given the opportunity, Grace walks over and sits on the stool next to Rook, draping an arm over her shoulder.

“You stayin’ frosty Dep?” Ugh, an audible grown came out of Rooks mouth when she heard the word ‘ _frosty’._ A word used by Grace a lot. Rook hated it each time she used it.

”Don’t know what the hell stayin frosty is,” Mary May placed a beer infront of Rook, “but yeah, I’m  _frosty.”_

Rook opened the beer and didn’t hesitate to swing it up and chug half of it down, she had motivation. The vibration happening down at her ass  made drinking the beer easier.

 Whatever the Seeds are talking about is quite controversial.

When Rook has her fill, she lowered the beer. Mary May eyes were wide and Grace was smiling. 

“I’m thirsty.” Was Rooks only response. Grace came closer, practically inches away from her ear and whispered oh so softly.

 “I bet ya are.” 

Rook and Mary May made eye contact, and Mary laughed at the blush growing on Rooks face and the grin that was threatening to become a full on smile.

” Aww Guys get a room.” Rook tried her best to hide her face....so she’s downed the beer. Oh man Rook shoulda knowed better because Mary’s passing her another one and Grace keeps throwing around sexual innuendos that surprise Rook because she’s never seen Grace do this, maybe she’s drunk? Nah, not Grace. 

Currently working her way down her third beer, her attention was drawn to Mary when she asked, “Holy hell Dep, what happened to you?” Obviously talking about the fact that Rooks drinking her third beer at 9:46 AM. Lowering her beer, Rook cleared her throat.

” I lost my dog.” She probably slurred a word in that sentace but Rook didn’t give a shit, she’s know on her fourth beer.

Grace chuckled a little.

Mary was confused, her eyebrows furrowing together. Boomer was napping in the corner of the bar next to the door so what the hell was Rook talking about?

 Some time later was when Rook realized just how strong the beer is, made her eyes water after downing her eighth.

Shit.

Rook couldn’t focus on the conversation Mary May and Grace was having. No one else was drunk but her, obviously it was still the morning. But Rooks a badass, so nineth beer down you go.

Bad idea.

Rook was  **wasted.** “Listen Guys, imma call it quits...” she trailed off, slurring about every word she said. Rook attempted to get off the stool but her legs felt like jello and Grace was on her in an instant. But not the way Rook wanted her to be. 

“No soldier, your _too_ drunk for that.” That damn soldier voice again, ugh. Graces hand gripped at Rooks hips, squeezing the soft curve there. Rooks arm found its way around Graces shoulder and Rook stared at her for a moment. Rook opened her mouth to say something.... but kinda just

stood there.

“See ya when your sober!” Mary’s voice was too damn loud for Rook so the only reply Rook gave was a groan.

———————-

Grace plopped Rook on her couch, soft cushions welcoming her with warmth, and a blanket being put on top of her body by Grace made Rook melt into the heat of it. 

“There ya go, do you need water?” A nod from Rook and Grace bolted it towards the kitchen. Coming back with a water in hand and placing it next to the couch.

”mmm, thanks Grace.” Was all Rook could say, the soldier never failed her, Rooks gratitude was bursting through the roof.

”no problem, try and get some sleep though okay? I gotta go help nick with something but remember, I’m a radio call away.” Ahh....Yes, rook remembers Nick radioing in, Don’t know what about but Grace and her were a few feet away from Rooks place and Rook couldn’t make out Graces responds either. Rooks a horrible drunk person.

Rook nodded, and watched Graces backside walk towards the door and-

The vibration coming her phone caught her attention instead, Grace long gone, Rooks could finally inspect what the Seeds were up too. Well drunk Rooks.

EDEN’S GATE:

JACOB SEED,10:00 AM

 “Steve where are you?”

EDEN’S GATE:

STEVE, 10:01 AM

”Currently at the henbane, why?”

EDEN’S GATE:

JACOB SEED, 10:01 AM

”you have my golden trout, I want it back.”

EDEN’S GATE:

STEVE, 10:01 AM

”yes sir, can I give it to you tomorrow though? I quite busy here.”

EDEN’S GATE:

JACOB SEED, 10:02 AM

”NO. Bring it to me now.”

EDEN’S GATE:

STEVE, 10:02 AM

”yes sir.”

EDEN’S GATE:

JOHN SEED, 10:02 AM

”My my, the wrath on you dearest brother, reminds me of a certain Deputy.”

Of course the conversation would get wrapped to be about her.

EDEN’S GATE:

JACOB SEED, 10:03 AM          

“Are you gonna go on a rant about her again John, tell me now so I can turn off my phone.”

Aww Johns goes on rants about her. How sweet.

EDEN’S GATE:

FAITH SEED, 10:03 AM

 “ The last one was quite entertaining!”

EDEN’S GATE:

JACOB SEED, 10:04 AM

”no it wasn’t, he spent thirty minutes COMPLAINING about losing his fancy ranch, it’s embarrassing.”

okkkaayyy... time to step in.

EDEN’S GATE:

DEPUTY ROOKS, 10:05 AM

” uhhh you mean my fancy ranch”

Rook was sobering a bit now.

EDEN’S GATE:

JOHN SEED, 10:05 AM

”No deputy, MY ranch, you stole it from ME. Stealing is a sin, just like lying. Do you like sinning Deputy? I think you do considering how you much you sin.”

EDEN’S GATE:

DEPUTY ROOKS, 10:06 AM

”depends on the sin, John”

While she waiting’s for a response, probably something along the lines of ‘you filthy sinner’ Rook switched contacts over to John. She pressed on the camera option and switched it too show her face. 

She took a selfie and sent it to John and John alone.

Her hair was loose from her ponytail, the front few pieces falling across the sides of her face. Her light green apple colored eyes were half closes, and finally her lips were red and parted to show her sticking out her tongue just a little. In the middle of it all was her middle finger. Hahaha rook was good at making John annoyed because know he switched over to their private conversation and they both ignored Jacob and faith aggressively texting away at the group chat.

JOHN SEED, 10:10 AM

 “Mmm, I didn’t know we were on these terms, don’t send me photos Deputy.”

short and threatening, anyone else would have been discouraged by his obvious disapproval but not the Deputy, oh no.

it was like a fire being smacked in her half sober stomach. She must annoy.

Rook was gonna take another selfie. Instead she decided she would sport a smile for this photo.

she stood up from where she was laying and tried to find the best lighting, now in her kitchen she set angled her phone the counter to show the top of her chest and back her face. She was wearing a black t shirt with a flannel around her waist and nothing else.

but John couldn’t see that.

she decided she would pose with a peace sign. She turned her body so it showed just the side of her body and looked at the camera, smiled, innocent face, peace sign in place, and she took the photo.

JOHN SEED, 10:13 AM

 “Now Deputy I know you have a problem with authority, ironically consider your job, but when I tell you not to do something. You listen.”

ooohhhhhh boy, Room did have a problem with authority, but the only person that could boss her around was her boss. So fuck you john.

DEPUTY ROOKS, 10:14 AM

”sorry Johnny, you not the boss of me.”

This was a perfect opportunity, how the hell was she not suppose to take it.

DEPUTY ROOKS, 10:15 AM

”I only listen to Jacob.”

ohhh she knew that’ll get John ruffled up. She knew that she probably get spammed by him because of this, but God damn it was just too easy.

His response? He stopped talking to her. Hahaha, instead he switched over to the Group chat. Rook didn’t consider the fact that she just sent two photos of herself to the enemy, or talked about his brother in a sexual manner. She just say it has annoying someone she liked to annoy. That’s it.

And then, an amazing idea crossed her mind. ‘Could I annoy the rest of them with photos’ well, she must test the theory.

First she started with Faith, how could she vex Faith? She was pretty level-headed compared to her ‘brothers’ so how? Rook thought for a few moments when she finally figured it out.

Faiths whole thing was too be pure, the white dress, the childish manner, the giggles and spins and fucking bunnies with antlers. Faith mastered the art of appearing innocent, while Rook was the complete opposite. Rook had dark black hair, and she wore crop tops saying trouble maker and denim jackets, Rooks had guns everywhere on her body and had the attitude to cut someone in half. She fucking walked around with a man eating cougar and diabetic bear for fucks sake.

Rook would simply send nudes.

well sorta, it would throw Faith off and give Rook a laugh when Faith gets all nervous and shit.

She angled her phone once again on the countertop, showing once again her chest and face, but this time, Rook dropped her flannel shirt covering her ass to the floor. She now only had a black shirt and matching black  boy shorts,hair loose from the ponytail and draping over her shoulders. She did the exact pose she did for John’s photo but instead she had a devilish grin and her Back was arched to show her ass in the photo. And click

And send.

FAITH SEED, 10:20 AM

”Deputy! Why would you send that to me? Where’s your modesty?”

Rook grinned at the response, just what she imagined. Her fingers danced on the screen and she typed out her actual response.

DEPUTY ROOKS,10:20 AM

”Aww C’mon, I showed you mine and now you gotta show me yours!”

She was asking to nudes..... man, she needed to get drunk again. But she has no time for that so on to Jacob she’s goes.

She knew what she was gonna send him, something that’ll surely piss him off, it would be a picture of his dog tags. She stole them from his office when Pratt freed her from the cage and pushed her into the truck. It was a millisecond decision but one that would surely last a decade. She hasn’t been back to the mountains since, knowing have the hunting party just itching to grab her.

when she sent the photo she accompanied it by the simple text saying, “the one who got away” ohh boy she couldn’t wait for him to text bac- oh.. he already did.

JACOB SEED, 10:23 AM

 “Lil pup, I’m gonna need those back when you come back home. You don’t deserve those.”

DEPUTY ROOKS, 10:24 AM

 “ Too late jacky, I already shoved them up my ass.” With the middle finger emoji.

what the hell? He was suppose to get pissed off but instead Rooks was the one throwing insults.

JACOB SEED, 10:24 AM

”guess I’ll just have to get them back the hard way.”

nnnnnnooooopppeee, Rooks shutting that shit down right now. She is not gonna encourage this. She already has fifty dirty jokes running her head because of the word ‘hard’. On to Joseph.

Joseph wasn’t really a texter kinda guy, or caller. Hell Rook thinks that maybe he’s to busy to be on his phone all day. So this one would be special, send him spiraling for days. She grabbed the Bible of Joseph, which she only had because.... because yea, and brought it to her backward.

it was sunny out and the she could see almost no clouds in the skies, in the distance was that yes sign. She really needed to get rid of that yes sign. She walked a few miles away from her house and onto a clearing. She dropped the book, brought her phone up and lit the book on fire. She sent a photo of the book burning to Joseph.

He didn’t respond at all.

Not a threat like John, or a sexual innuendos like Jacob.

just nothing.

fuck him.

ugh.

Rooked walked back to her house. Dropped herself back onto her couch and cozied up and covered herself with her blanket.

slowly fading away.

when her phone vibrated.

” For fucks sake what is it?”

she was surprised to see it was from John. She opened the their messages and her fucking jaw dropped.

she had to physically stand up from shock. She was in shock. What the fuck. She looked down back at the phone and there it was, John sent her a photo.

of him.

it only showed his face and chest, vest opened an extra button and his eyebrows where knit together, playfully. He was showing his big blue eyes and had a pout like a little child. Rook was speechless.

JOHN SEED, 10:30 AM

 “This is the face I make when you disappoint Jesus.”

this was so unlike him, he didn’t have any big words that Rook had to Wikipedia search the meaning of, no threats to her well being, no confession mentions and no yes. Rook doesn’t be know how to reply to this side of John which she thought he never had, he was joking with her, he sent a selfie of himself pouting to her, like they were friends.

DEPUTY ROOKS, 10:32 AM

 “What a pretty face, reminds me of the face you made when you were on tv.” 

She felt wrong writing that response, it was too normal. Too normal and not hostile at all. She didn’t make fun of him, she didn’t curse him out or try to annoy him, she just

 

complemented him.

Like friends do.....

Rook took a nap after that and tried to think of anything but what had just happened.

theyre not friends 

nope

not at allll

oh my god he just texted back.

”well... I need to see his reply.” Rook husky voice cut through the silence. Opening her phone up and switching over to John messages.

JOHN SEED, 10:34 AM

”Thank you for the compliment Deputy, I didn’t know you sinners had TV.”

yeah

not friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOOHHH MY GOD, that took my 3 hours to write, if there’s grammar issues I’m sorry. It took my body 3 hours to write this and I’m not gonna spent another hour editing it


	4. An Eventful Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John needs some chill pills, and ohh, his main chic meets his side chick this is juicy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one kinda cut off short, but that’s because I’m super tired and need BEAUTY SLEEP yea just like Rook

It was eventful day today, even for Rook.

It all started at around 7:48 PM, Rook has previously passed the FUCK out after texting her favorite sadist. It was all shits’n’giggles until she woke up to the butt of rifle hitting her face.

Today’s was an exciting day.

She went fishing, lost her dog, found her dog, got drunk, sent nudes, passed out and is currently being kidnapped. The rifle knocked her unconscious, not remembering the shift between laying on her couch to sitting on something cold and metal. Rook was blindfolded, she couldn’t hear much except some crappy music she couldn’t care to distinguish. Well, even though Rook was blindfolded, she knew it was Peggie’s. And if Peggie’s took her she must be in a van.

Because everyone knows that if you gonna kidnap someone, you have to kidnap them in the most kidnappy vehicle possible.

The cold metal of the van floor hit her ass each time they hit a bump. They left her in her boy shorts. Not surprising but extremely annoying, every goddamn bump they hit was agony. Another Rook noticed was the lack of restraints. Her hands were placed behind her but had nothing holding them together. No handcuffs. No ropes.

This deeply concerned Rook, why wouldn’t they handcuff her? She was dangerous. Whoever told them not too or decided they’d be safe without them on her was pretty cocky. Dismissing the round of insults racing in her head about how stupid her kidnappers are, Rooks hand gripped at the edges of her blindfold and lifted them off her face.

The van stopped while she did that.

Rook focused on hearing the footsteps walking their way towards the back door, two. There were two of them. When they opened the door, Rooks calculations were proven correct. What the fuck, she’s horrible at math. They’re bearded middle aged men wearing the usual Peggie get up, didn’t look strong. Rook could’ve sworn she’s killed these two before, was it the one she sliced the throat of? Or the one she buried her fists into? Rook doesn’t know.

“Hello boys,” she spoke directly towards the rifle they held at her face, “have you seen my pants by any chance?” Point one for Rook, that rhymed. Point two because it wasn’t funny and she’s meant it as a joke because she always resorted to humor in times like this.

“Yes sinner, in your god forsaken house along with your modesty.” Husky, he had a very husky voice. He’s older than her then.

“Well fuck you douche, I had no choice in the matter since I was currently unconscious and being kidnapped.” Rooks lighthearted tone died off around the words ‘douche’. The silent one yabked her out of the van. Holding a firm grip on her left bicep, the other still pointed the gun at her. That’s when she realized how fucked she was.

It was the Seed Ranch. Big and beautiful, well guarded and with the sunset lightning, goddamn gorgeous. The breeze made Rook suddenly aware of her lack of pants. She’s done it before, kill Peggie’s without her pants on, all because of Sharky though and technically they were angels and she was very drunk during that time. So her confidence was normal, Rook just acted like she hadn’t pants on, I mean she has nothing to be embarrassed about.

The silent one pushed her along the walkway, every goddamn Peggie and their mother took a glance at her. No catcalls or whispers, just wandering glares. If it wasn’t for the Peggie behind her they’d definitely be looking at her ass right now. The religious ones are always the freakiest ones behind closed doors. 

“Go on.” The husky voice was so serious, the rifle was so serious, the man in general was so serious and it made Rooks teeth grind. She didn’t like serious people. Only Grace. 

He was obviously talking down to her, how dare he? Rook probably killed his family, she sure as hell killed his friends. Rooks the enemy, the sinner, wrath itself and he’s talking down to her? 

Rook has no advantage, no backup, no plan and no pants. But Rook has herself. The little devil inside of her will get her outta here safe and sound.

“Good day soldier.” A dead tone in response to a serious one. Rook glares at him until she opened the front doors and closed them behind her. The ranch outside was impressive but the ranch inside was just.... something else. The fireplace was lit. Their were dead animals everywhere, stuffed and placed in their spot in the ranch, John probably didn’t even hunt but he still had them anyway. And oh god the fucking Eden’s gate shrine to Rooks right was god awful. Although, with all these details she could focus on, she focused on the most important.

There was a woman in the dining room, hidden by the fire from Rooks angle. Rook cafefully took a few steps sideways and saw the woman with her back turned to her. Brunette hair pulled in a loose low ponytail.

Easy for Rook to grab.

She had baggy clothes on, each item had the Eden’s gate symbol on it and it completely covered her figure.

If Rook were to fail at choking her to death and she tried to run, the noise of fabric rubbing against each other would give her away.

And finally, a rifle, practically hanging off her left hand. 

The woman had barely any grin on it. She was leaning over the table looking at something. A map maybe. She’s didn’t seem to notice Rook moving closer.

She didn’t notice Rook raising her left hand over her hair and her right ready to grab the woman mouth. 

Rook was about to do it, kill this woman and steal her pants and get the FUCK out of here but she took to long, Rook’s body spinning around and the woman casually looking over her shoulder.

“Deputy! Isn’t it so hard to text me back? So hard to answer my ca-“ John was halfway walking down the stairway when he noticed the Deputys nakedness. Rook caught the stare he was giving her legs and felt relieved. Neither him nor the woman knew what Rook was about to do. But yeah, they both noticed she was half naked which was kinda sorta bad.

Rook opened her mouth, ready to attack John with questions, but again, she was too slow.

“Deputy, did you do this of your own free will, or did my men catch you at the wrong time?” His left hand signaled to her legs. He walked the rest of the way down the stairs and waited for a response. A small grin playing at his face mad Rooks stomach turn, The only person who found his jokes funny were himself.

Rook on the other hand was weighing her options. Option A, she yell at John and probably end up on the he torture chair or Option B, she explains to John what happened and....probably end up in the torture chair. 

What’s that saying?

‘You go to hell for one sin anyway, so why not come down there with a thousand and be remembered a legend?’

Ah yeah....Rook wanted to be a legend.

“Oh fuck you, you massive fucking shitstain. I didn’t choose to come down here half naked, your fucking idiot Peggie’s decided not to put on my pants when they knocked me unconscious!” Rooks voice was just barely over yelling and full off venom. The woman sneered when Rook said ‘shitstain’ but John just seemed conflicted. Like he didn’t know who he should punish, the Peggie’s who obviously did this because they were Pervy and petty or Rook, because he didn’t know if she’s was lying or not she could’ve come down here without her pants willingly and that would been very lustfull of her.

Very lustfull if she wanted to show him that part of her, sinful.

“Hello? Earth to John, I want some fucking pants.” Rooks voice snapped him out of his trance, my oh my he just dosed off and completely ignored everything Rook said to him. More like yelled.

“Holly, Get her my pair of sweatpants.” John didn’t demand, more like casually told her to do so. Rook now had a name to the woman face. She seemed in her mid 30s but pretty. It didn’t really concern Rook at the time, she just wanted goddamn pants. 

“Holly ehh? You two best friends or something?” Rook wasn’t making fun of him, her tone wasnt mocking but John’s face seemed like she’s just called him shitstain all over again. “Me and Holly have known each other for a while now Deputy, none of your concern, what’s more important is why you weren’t answering me.” 

Jesus fucking Christ, he woke her up for this shit. He was fucking worried why she wasn’t texting back like some teenage cou- Rook didn’t dare finish that thought.

“I feel asleep okay? Right after I texted you I passed out.” They stared at each other for some time. Rooks still not fully understanding the situation and John seemed a little relieved, he fixed his posture a little straighter and cleared his throat.

“Well Deputy, i called you several times. Did you not hear them. Not. One?” He got more and more annoyed by each second wasted. He wanted her answering his questions at lightning speed but he got her at sleepy time so he must deal with Rooks sleepy time brain. He just needed to be patient, but he’s wasn’t patient man.

“Nope.” 

Holly came down with the sweatpants folded in her hands, she walked to Rook and handed her the pants. Rook noticed how she carried this calm demeanor, like she’s just smoked twenty joints and is high on bliss right now. “Thanks.” Was all Rook could offer, sleep creeping up behind and a yawn escaped her body when she pulled the pants fully on.

They fit her like a glove, John and Rook were the same height so they’d probably were the same size, and if not sweatpants were made to be stretchy. “Hey John, I love our little chats but I’m fucking tiredness can I passed out or....what?” Oh Rook intended that to sound casual, she wanted John so see how confident she’s was.

“Not until you read over the text she and answer my question Deputy.” John placed a hand on her shoulders and squeezed. It would’ve been friendly if he had a smile on.

“Ugh Jesus Christ okay.” Rook rolled her eyes dramatically. She’s wanted goddamn fucking sleep.

“Not the word I want Deputy.”

“Ugh, yes John, I’ll read your fucking texts.” He smiled at that and retracted his hand.

“See how’s easy that was? Now I just need a confession.”

Man he really isnt a patient man.

No.

Not at all.

Hey, I wonder if Jacob texted.


End file.
